Positive pregnancy tests are supposed to be filled with excitement and joy. Instead, this one was filled with excitement, but also fear. Fear that we would lose yet another precious baby. Fear that my body would fail me yet again and I would lose all faith its ability to function the way it should.
So I waited. I told very few people, and even kept it a secret from Zack for a few weeks. I didn't want to excite him, only to devastate him once again if this pregnancy didn't stick.
The weeks went by, and things seemed well. I was nervous, of course. Feeling scared and paranoid every time I went to the bathroom... but while that underlying fear was there, I was not feeling the overwhelming sense of dread that I had felt in the beginning of the pregnancies that I had lost. I used a natural, low dose progesterone cream for the entire first trimester of this pregnancy. We had a feeling that this would help my body get through those early weeks that I was having trouble with before. Finally, we got out of the "danger zone" for my body. Then, we got out of the more common "danger zone" of 12 weeks. By this point, I was confident in my body, this pregnancy, and this baby.
We announced our pregnancy when I was 14 weeks. My body had already changed so much by this point, much to my surprise. I couldn't believe how quickly I showed with this baby. My belly immediately began to stretch, causing a slew of stretch marks, which I had not gotten during my pregnancy with Piper. While it was difficult at first, I learned to love and appreciate them as a sign that this baby was growing so well inside of my body. How could I be anything but grateful?
Around 38 weeks, I had a night full of prodromal labor. I was having painful contractions that were 4 minutes apart, for nearly three hours. Being that my birth team was an hour and a half away, we had discussed that I would notify my midwife as soon as I realized that labor was starting. For whatever reason, I didn't feel ready to call anybody. I must have instinctually known that this was just a "practice round".
After that, I continued to have consistent contractions on and off every few days. It was exhausting, both physically and mentally. I was ready to meet my baby. I was ready to feel like myself again. That last week and a half was so hard. We did gentle things to try to move things along... meditation, sex, acupressure/acupuncture, massage, chiropractic adjustments. Nothing really helped, and by Tuesday (the 20th) night I had totally stopped trying and just decided to let go and let my body do its thing. We scheduled an appointment with my midwife for Wednesday morning to do a regular check up.
The morning that I went into labor (Wednesday the 21st) I didn't even fall asleep until one AM. Zack was out on a call and didn't get home until just after midnight. We talked for a while before heading into bed, and once I was in bed I just tossed and turned. I think my body knew what was happening, but I had convinced myself it was because I was afraid of sleeping through my alarm for the morning.
After finally dozing off, I woke up at 1:20 am to a huge release of pressure. I instinctively jumped out of bed, and as I stood up a ton of 'water' gushed out onto my bedroom floor. I wish I had a photo of my expression when that happened, because I'm sure it would be hilarious. I literally said, "holy shit!" and ran into the bathroom. Right outside the bathroom door, another gush came rushing out and I realized that my water had definitely just broken. I immediately called my midwife to let her know.
Over the phone, she confirmed what I already knew and told me that it *could* be that day, or it could be a few more days until I went into active labor. Since no contractions had started yet, I decided to go back to bed to try to rest. That "rest" didn't quite happen because my contractions started up at 1:45am, and by 2:08am they were regular and about two and a half minutes apart. At that point I was out of bed and standing in the bathroom, rocking through each contraction. I decided that I was going to let Zack sleep until I felt like I really needed him, because he had just fallen asleep and I had no idea how long this labor would last. I did rush into the bedroom at one point and asked him to pick up the clothes off the bathroom floor because they were driving me crazy. He thought I had lost my mind until I told him that my water broke and I was in labor.
Once I realized that the contractions were so close together and not slowing at all, I called my midwife back and let her know what was going on. Two and a half minutes apart, lasting around 50 seconds each... She told me she was on her way. I then decided that it was time to call my sister in law, Victoria. After getting a hold of her and letting her know that it was time, I stayed in the bathroom a few minutes longer and put on a little makeup. I had told myself throughout my entire pregnancy that I wanted to at least fill in my eyebrows because I wanted beautiful birth photos that I loved to look back on. Once I finished my makeup, I moved out to the living room to labor out there and wait for everyone to arrive.
I stood over a towel on my living room floor, rocking and moaning through the contractions. The towel was there as a protective barrier to the floor, because every once in a while a little bit more of my waters would come gushing out as I worked through a surge.
The contractions were so close together. They quickly went from 2:30 apart, to 2:00 apart, and by around 3:05am they were only a minute and a half apart. At this point I felt like I was getting no reprieve. Surge after surge after surge... I was moaning louder through them now, and getting a bit nervous that my noises would wake Piper.
Victoria walked through the door just before 4:00am and immediately got to work filling up the birth pool that was set up in the dining room. I knew this would be a challenge, as we didn't have a hose adapter and our hot water tank is fairly small. Bucket after bucket went into the pool as I continued to labor in the living room. I was switching back and forth between standing/rocking through contractions, and kneeling over the couch when my legs felt too weak to stand. Shortly after Victoria arrived, I went back in the bedroom to get Zack. I needed him at this point, even if just to know he was close by. He laid on the couch with his head right beside mine, and held my hands.
Going through that quick of a labor is really interesting... the intensity is so high. I felt like I couldn't talk or even think because my body was working so hard. I didn't know of anything that was happening around me (despite the fact that there were 3 kids and several adults all surrounding me) other than the fact that Zack was right up by my face, which is exactly where I needed him to be.
My legs were starting to feel like jello after being on my knees for such a long time. I just wanted it to be over. I felt like it was never going to end. But at one point I distinctly remember my midwife saying to me, "Megan, I know this is hard. It is going very fast, but you are going to have your baby very soon." I really listened and held onto those words. Every time my body got slammed with a contraction, I kept thinking, "Just a few more... just a few more... I'm about to meet my baby".
There was one point in time where I remember wanting so badly to ask Monica how many more contractions I had left, but obviously knew that was a ridiculous question that nobody could answer.
I had my face buried in a pillow and I was making very throaty groans through some of my last contractions. Monica reminded me to stop the throaty sounds and keep my moans deep. I heard her say it, but it wasn't registering for me. The pain was too intense to focus on her words and actually do what she said. This is where Zack became more helpful than I could have ever imagined. Every time I started making the throaty sounds, he would whisper in my ear, "Remember, keep it deep... you're doing great. Out of your throat, keep it deep.... deep... deep...". It was exactly what I needed to get through those last few contractions. I literally heard nothing other than his voice echoing in my head.
At some point, Piper woke up and came out to the living room. It was perfect timing. She had said from the very beginning of my pregnancy that she wanted to see her brother be born. I am so thankful that she woke up when she did. She was excited, and just sat right down with Victoria and watched from the other side of the room. What I hear from my birth team is that there was some pretty awesome commentary coming from the toddlers as he was being born.
It didn't take long for me to feel the immense pressure of baby's head pushing down, and I knew he would be here in no time at all. Monica reminded me that right before the baby was going to come out, she was going to tell me to take a deep breath. In no time at all she was telling me to take that deep breath, and I could feel his head descending down.
If I remember correctly, it only took two or three contractions to get him all the way out. It was fast. Monica helped him out, since I had my hands above me, squeezing Zack's hands through the pain. Once he was out, I immediately sat up and pulled him between my legs and up to my chest. I held him close, leaned down to smother him in kisses, and then asked Zack to get the hair out of my face that was stuck to me with sweat.
I spun around so I could be in more of a sitting position while we waited for my placenta. Everybody just sat around and watched as he took in his first few minutes of life. There was so much love in the air... you could literally feel it.
Rhett Lewis Gallipeau
September 21, 2016
5:17 am
8 lbs. 4 oz.
20 inches long
